Eye Eye

I've just had an iridotomy and what a palaver. I had been trying not to worry about my appointment for weeks and joking with everyone that if I wend blind in one eye, I could wear an eye patch like Madonna's Madame X. I could even bring out my own range and try to sell them at the optician's, where I work.

My husband and I assumed that I would need to be nil by mouth for the procedure. Arriving at the hospital, I was told that the consultant was running behind by an hour. My stomach was already rumbling but I soldiered on thinking that the time would fly by with all my reading material to keep me going. I had some emergency oat & raisin biscuits in my bag for straight afterwards, so I was all set.

I had also assumed after being given two hospital dates that one eye would be done this time and the other in two weeks time, just in case I went blind in one eye. Obviously, I had been over this a few times in my head. I had even pre-ordered an eye patch on Amazon in preparation for when I got home.

After a short while, a nurse called me over to have some drops put into both my eyes. I thought it was a bit strange but guessed the doctor would decide which eye should go first when I saw her.

Once summoned to the dark, laser room, my husband was ushered out and I sat at the machine waiting for the show to begin. A red light juddered through my eye, which thankfully had been numbed and so didn't hurt with a contact lens contraption holding it wide open. I had to stay completely still and I could feel my whole body tense, as a hole burned through my iris to relieve pressure and allow fluid to flow freely.

A rush of heat whooshed up from my back to the top of my head and I realised I was having a hot flush. Not now, of all times, I thought. The next minute the procedure was all over and the consultant asked me how I was. A sudden urge to throw up came over me and I felt like I was going to faint. The door opened and the doctor rushed out to ask for a cardboard sick bowl. My poor husband stood on watching as my eyes rolled back and I was retching. He and a nurse guided me into a cooler room nearby to sit down. The next thing I knew, the chair was rocked back so that my legs were higher than my heart. My blood pressure was taken and it was 86 and so low. I was asked when I last ate and I told them I was nil by mouth. The nurse laughed and blessed me saying it wasn't an operation, only laser so I didn't need to be nil by mouth. I was made a cup of coffee and I reached into my bag to dunk my cookies in. Within five minutes, I was feeling more human again. My blood pressure was re-taken and up to 106.

The doctor came to see if I was feeling better and happy to have my other eye done now. It was all such a blur that I agreed, thinking that as I could see in both eyes, it had been a success so I might as well get it over with rather than having to go all through this again on another day. This time, it was all done and dusted within a few minutes.

The red veins in my eyes have calmed to a soft pink and I can actually see the whites of my eyes clearly. Before it used to look like my irises were stuck on a couple of boiled eggs, ready to burst but now they look like lily pads on calm, clear water. I didn't even have any drugs - just eye drops. My eyes feel refreshed and I'm so relieved it's all over.